Advent day 4

Light. It has an amazing, ever-changing, dramatic effect on everything it illuminates. The right light makes all the difference in rooms, landscapes, and paintings.
Look at the photographs below. The first two were taken by a friend this afternoon at about 3.00 p.m. It was a beautiful day in Stockholm. The sun shone brightly for the few hours it was out creating an amazing sunset, at 3.15 p.m.

The photograph below was taken last July at about 11.00 p.m. It's hard to imagine that these photographs, both taken at sunset, are taken almost 8 hours apart!

The light in Stockholm is something that always amazes me. The short winter days with so little light cause us to rejoice when the sun comes out for the few hours it's actually above the horizon. Blink and you miss it! The lack of light gnaws at your soul and sometimes hems you in. It's hard to understand the effect of the short day if you've never been here to experience it.
Darkness falls quickly this time of year.
The long summer days dazzle in an entirely different manner.
The beauty and wonder of an almost never ceasing light create a warmth and a comfort that is difficult to understand if you've never experienced it.
Most of us who live in Sweden prefer the season of light over the season of darkness. The only way that most of us endure the long winter is by creating extra light sources in our homes through lamps and candles. The darkness must be pierced or one cannot endure it.
The theology embedded within the Swedish winter is not so hard to understand. The darkness of our lives can only be endured if we allow the light of Christ to pierce it with his love and grace. We all have "summer seasons" in our lives...when the light of Christ is long and lingering and we feel as though we are living in a steady stream of God's grace. But we all have "winter seasons" as well...when the dark spots of our lives appear all too often and come upon us too quickly and we hunger and yearn for an extra dose of Christ's love and grace. The recurring message of Advent is that there is light enough to cover whatever darkness threatens our lives.
The wonderful thing about the light of Christ is that it never ceases to deliver what we need. It does not fade or flicker. It shines brightly against the backdrop of our greatest joy and our deepest sorrow. It covers our best moments and our worst shame.
I love the light in Stockholm...whether it be the short, quick light of our winter days, or the long, lingering, lasting light of summer...but no matter the season, I'm thankful for the light of Christ that blots out my darkness and illuminates the road ahead for me.

Waning Days

mid-July, 10.00 pm

We've been lucky to have a stunningly beautiful September. It has definitely made up for what I would call about a B- summer. Some of the summer was perfect, but there was a pretty good stretch in July where cloudiness reigned. I remember being very grumpy about it all and my husband wondering aloud if I could just accept that weather is weather and does not have to be the great determinate of a satisfying life. But I live in Sweden I argue. I have darkness imposed upon me for several months of the year so when the light season is upon us, is it too much to ask that the sun actually shine for all of its 23 hours?shadows at the summer soltice

We just passed the autumn solstice and never before in my life have I paid so much attention to the solstices . September 21 marked the beginning of more hours of darkness than daylight. I may have cried a little that day. From now until December 21 we descend into a darker world. And even though it's really dark and the days are really short for about a month after the winter solstice, I somehow feel a bit of joy when the longest night has passed. At least I feel that we are ascending into light again. It feels very theological, but I'll save that for another day.

I have had genuine feelings of sadness as the summer light has faded. I woke up at 6.30 the other morning and it was still light outside and I was so thankful. I am so happy that my daytime and even early evening walks with Tanner are in the light. Soon, all of it will be in the dark. It is hard for me. It is hard for everyone. I have rarely heard someone say, "Oh, I just can't wait until the days get shorter."mid-July, 10.30 pm

Of course, you do find your rhythm and figure it out, but I don't think I could ever grow to like it. People will say to me, "Oh, I couldn't live in that kind of darkness." And I answer, "Well, you could if you lived in Sweden!" If someone had told me 12 years ago that I could live for 11 plus years in a place where you only got 6 hours of daylight I would've laughed in their face. My goal in life was to head south to warmer, lighter destinations. Too bad God had different ideas! So it's not so much about being able to do it...you just do it because you have no choice if you are going to live in Sweden. But you do have to figure out coping methods. So, in order to stave off the jarring affect of those early short days, we're going to the Italian island of Sardinia mid-October. We should be able to walk on the beach, sit on a terrace, wear light weight clothing, maybe swim in the sea. I should be able to boost my tan which, again, shows how shallow I really can be. Being tan helps me cope with the darkness. And of course, in God's great grace, he knew that if he moved me this far north, he needed to provide an outlet so he's kept my folks firmly planted in Palm Springs, California where we head every winter for a couple of weeks.
It's not soooo bad living here. But I will miss getting up in the morning and opening my blinds and seeing the day sky. I hate walking the dog in the dark all the time. It's hard to slog through the afternoon when it feels like the middle of the night and all you want to do is go to bed. I think the bears have it right...just sleep off the winter and reemerge when spring arrives. Today looks like a nice day. I better get out and soak it up.